My heart breaks tonight. There are so many people in the world, many of them Christians, that are in need of so much divine healing and guidance. Some are weighed down with physical issues that have no cure, some with depression that medicine cannot fix. Some people cannot seem to find any hopeful or safe relationships, while others have been trampled by the worlds of poverty, drugs, homelessness, or violence. Our world needs healing so badly, and the signs are everywhere. A man spends all of his time at work in order to be more, do more, earn more. A woman goes from man to man, never finding fulfillment, never finding a secure relationship. Teenagers spend their time trying to be like the people on TV or the radio. We seem to think if we could be "that" or have "that," our lives would be different. Our churches feed us information about how to fix our marriages, how to get out of debt, and how to temper our baser nature. We try to learn, we try to grow, we try to fix ourselves, but something is still missing. Sometimes we even fall to our knees in prayer, or see a counselor, or try to move on and start over again.
Sometimes it seems that none of this works.
I guess you could say I'm in a melancholy mood tonight. I realize that we are living in an "in-between" age: Christ has died and defeated sin, but the world is still not made whole. Shalom is yet to come, this full, balanced, peaceful existence, just like we were created. But not yet. I am frustrated by the people who bicker back and forth, never making peace, but only getting angrier and angrier. I am frustrated by politicians who think this is all "their" fault and they have the answer to our problems, I am frustrated by people who take advantage of others through greed or jealousy or hatred or prejudice. I am frustrated by Christians who say they believe in Christ and all that entails but never even look a homeless person in the eye or help a family deep in poverty. I am frustrated by a culture and a country that looks to more, more, more, at the expense of God's children everywhere.
Come, Lord Jesus. We need healing.
Thursday, October 14
Just a quick post tonight. I was at Starbucks over on 21st avenue tonight for about five hours working on a Christian ethics project. I couldn't help but realize how much I love this city. Sitting there with such a diverse mix of people, sipping a pumpkin spice latte, was so relaxing. There were some people sitting at the table next to me speaking in Chinese and a group behind me speaking in a thick New York accent. I witnessed a reunion where the parties just embraced each other and I even got a grande latte because the barista was amazing. :) It's technically already my fall break, and I had to work on a project, but tonight I honestly didn't care. On the drive home from Starbucks, there was barely any traffic as I drove along music row back to Belmont. It was about 65 degrees and I drove about 5 miles under the speed limit, just enjoying the beauty. I am a big believer that the concept of 'place' has a big effect on a person, and I love how Nashville feels to me. I feel at home here and it kills me that I have to leave after graduation! Wedding plans are exiting and I absolutely cannot wait to marry the man of my dreams, but the bittersweet part is that I may never live here again. I guess one of my goals for this year is to enjoy the time I have left in Nashville and at Belmont, because I know I will miss it after I earn my diploma. I am so grateful that God led me to Belmont and Nashville!